Saturday, March 14, 2009

Identity

Any writer interjects in hus work a part of his own personality and experience. This applies to any expressive behavior and is the basic assumption of projective tests of personality such as the Rorschach and Thematic Apperception Test. Those who write autobiographical material reveal themselves consciously and willingly. However there are risks involved.

In my recent novel "Shrink: Odyssey of a Therapist," the beginning section describes the early life, education and training of the psychologist hero, Morrie Schwartz. I reveal in the Preface that much of the material is based on my own life, although changes were made to fit the story that ensues, which is totally fictional. I chose not to reveal which is real and which is fabrication. Once I opened the door, however, I became vulnerable. My sister was upset thatI described Morrie's parents as "cold." My own parents were not cold but I had raised doubts in my sister's mind about my true feelings and incurred criticism. In the last section of the book Morrie has a series of paranormal experiences that lead to his own psychological breakdown. My sister worried that perhaps I also was having such experiences. My wife was somewhat upset that Morrie's love interest in the book, and subsequently his wife, resembled a younger psychologist friend and colleague. In truth, the fictional character was a composite of both friend and wife. In an earlier version of the story I had killed off the hero at the end. My wife was so upset I rewrote the ending, which was good thing for I left the door open to a sequel, also to be published.

Such are the risks involved in revealing. While anyone masochistic enough to attempt to write for publication risks criticism, autobiographical references bring on a particularly personal type of censure. While I will not stop writing, I hope to be sufficiently creative in the future to seek creative inspiration in non-personal material.

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